Sunday, October 28, 2007

TOM

If you're a female, you definitely know Tom ;o) You know...

the Tom that comes around once a month
the Tom that irritates us and unleashes our wrath
the Tom that sends us on eating binges so we gain weight
the Tom that wakes us up in the middle of the night and starves us of sleep
the Tom that is twisted enough to inflict pain


As far as I'm concerned, Tom can take a flying leap into the Grand Canyon! LOL! Why were we cursed with this monster? Tom is nothing but an inconvenience that I'm sure any woman can do without. There is only one thing Tom is good for, depending on your preferred outcome :o)

You know what really irks me? There's an ad on television for Always (panty liners) and their slogan is "Have a happy period, always." WHAT? Happy and period in the same sentence? I don't think so! You know, you just know that a man came up with that marketing campaign ;o)

Now I've been blessed with both Tom and menopause, even before I reached the age of 34. I'm not sure which I detest more. It's basically just replacing one sadistic act with another. Instead of pain, you experience hot flashes and let me tell you, it's very embarrassing when your ears turn an extra dark shade of crimson while you're in a meeting. Do you remember the commercial for those home heating units? Well, I was that woman who ran outside, in the middle of winter, with nothing but a t-shirt and shorts ;o)

To be perfectly honest though, aside from the few discomforts, I felt my best during those four years. Plus, I save A LOT of money. LOL! I'd be scared to calculate just how much we do spend on those "necessities". What do men have to worry about? Shaving? Big deal! We shave too. Do you ever see any embarrassing ads on television for men? No, because it's all taken up by Tampex, Always, KY and Vagisil.

So I guess I might as well accept the fact that this will be 'Bitch Week'. Maybe I should track down that company that makes pregnancy tests. Their slogan? "This is the most sophisticated piece of technology that you will ever pee on." (thanks for the correct wording Christine!) I'm NOT kidding :oP

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tom stays with me for three weeks out of four very often at the moment (since Riley). Roll on my gyne appt in Feb 08 and a date for the possible end of Tom forever!

Hope your week isn't too bad. Dig out the pain killers, hottie bottle and big fleece blankie.

PS. My DH says Tampax cost way too much and next month he's buying me cotton wool and string so I can make my own! PMSL

Marita said...

I remember unwrapping a "Always" panty liner and finding that horrible "Have a Happy Period, Always" comment on the inside cover.

Right at that point in time I wanted to take a machine gun to the damn thing.

Lucky for me I was part of a test survey group so I got to provide feedback to the company on how offensive that line is. Seems they didn't listen to me though. Perhaps the machine gun would have been a more effective communication tool.

Christine S said...

Actually, I thought the commercial for "The most sophisticated piece of technology you will ever pee on" was hilarious!! I do agree that the "Have a happy period" campaign has to be one of the stupidest ones I've ever seen.

Though I think the Viagra commercials where people are talking gobbledegook are even more stupid!!!

Jo said...

I've never heard it called Tom before!

I like the phrase "the Bitch Fairy has come to visit".

Have a happy period?? Had to be written by a man!

Karen said...

A delight I haven't had for almost 4 years thanks to a emergancy hysterectomy , mind you before that my visits only lasted 24 hours until the last 2 months lol, but life is cheaper ;O)
as for the going a nice dark shade of crimson I have spent all my life life that I blush at the drop of a hat lol even if there is nothing really embarassing happening even now I can go red just from a look lol its so annoying

Laural said...

I hate that Always slogan! It would be more appropriate as a Midol campaign.

I hate the pregnancy test commercial too. They try to make the test look ultra sleek and sophisticated then they say pee? And who cares if their test is "sophisticated?"

Stitchabilities said...

ROFL When I was younger I hadn't heard the TOM expression,until a boyfriend who I was trying to impress,mentioned it by saying "Has Tom come for a visit" I looked at him as if he had gone mad and then he explained it to me,That's when I went crimson!!
(I can't remember why he said it though, just that bit!!)Now I'm blushing again!

Jocelyn said...

I am hoping your week is going well, and I REALLY hope you are feeling better. Yes, I know exactly how you feel. Tom is extremely hard on me as well. I don't like the pain, but it's the major sleep disruptions I simply can't deal with. First I can't get to sleep, then I can't stay asleep. Ugh. I do hate it so.

Yup, Hancock's of Paducah is a fabric catalog. Sometimes a dangerous one at that!! :)