Monday, May 28, 2012

Another Curve Ball

I know I have been MIA lately. I've received many emails wondering where I am and I apologize that I have not responded to anyone. You'd expect me to be living the good life; happy with my little man and relishing my new role as a mother. I certainly am but I've also been hiding another secret, this being an unhappy one. Now that I have confirmation, I want to update you all as to what is going on.

Do you remember back in my last months of pregnancy when I was complaining about my chest hurting and everyone came to the same conclusion that it must be muscular in nature? Well, that pain continued when we brought Junior home from the hospital. The first round of drugs that my doctor put me on did not work. When it got so bad that I could not even hold Junior, I went back to see him again. This time he put me on a narcotic and ordered some tests to eliminate alternate possibilities that would explain the pain.

While looking for one thing, they found something else...something that never even crossed our minds. During one of the scans, they found a 5 cm hole in my sternum (bone). The bone scan lit up a tiny corner of the hole, indicating that it could be cancer. Last week I went to Halifax and had a biopsy done. It was is cancer :o(

Now we don't have all the particulars and there is only so much information I can give at this time. From what I understand, this could be metastatic bone cancer, resulting from my breast cancer in 2000. Who would have thought that would come back to haunt me? As of today, I'm waiting for a CAT Scan and then we'll meet with an Oncologist in Halifax in about 2-3 weeks. As I have said before, the waiting is always the hardest part, especially when you don't know what you're dealing with and you have so many questions swirling around in your head.

To say that we're scared is an understatement. This was supposed to be a happy time in our lives. I finally found my purpose in life and now I'm terrified that it will be taken away from me. Every day I look at Junior and wonder if he'll have a mother as he grows up. I know I may be jumping the gun but I have to be open to that possibility. As soon as I know more, I'll post another update.

I want to thank everyone for their emails. I'm not sure when I'll get to answering any of them but I hope you will understand. I do want to let Christina, Marion, Valerie (France) and Jane know that I have received your packages and I will be in touch! I can't thank you enough :o) Mouse, nothing has arrived as of today :o(

I miss you all very much but this is a very emotional time here at the Pumpkin Patch and the most important thing is that I be with my family. I may have quite a busy road ahead of me so if I don't email you back, please know I will try but I cannot guarantee it. You had been so wonderful during my pregnancy and I can't tell you how much I appreciated it :o) All those words of support kept my spirits up. You guys are THE BEST!

Tuesday, May 08, 2012

Look Who's...

Four weeks old!!!!


It's hard to believe. Now I know what people mean when they say that the time goes by fast. Yesterday, Junior weighed in at 9 pounds, 7 ounces! My boy is growing.

We had a slight wardrobe malfunction this morning. I had a cute little outfit all set out for Junior to wear but quickly realized that he looked like he was sporting a potato sack! Not the look we were going for ;o)