Yesterday was my birthday. What did I get this year? A snotty cold from darling Junior and a new Chemo drug from my Oncologist :o) Aren't I a lucky girl? LOL!
Yes, you heard me right, I'm going to be going on 'another' Chemo drug :o( The last one wasn't showing results and in fact, the tumors on my chest have been getting worse. I know that usually the third time is the charm but maybe in this case it will be the fourth. Fingers crossed because my playing field is narrowing even faster. Sigh!
That's pretty much where we are at this point. I start my new Chemo (Caelyx) tomorrow and it will be once every four weeks. Oh how I pray that this will be the one to kick this cancer's ass! The tumors under the skin are very uncomfortable, not to mention ugly looking (but that's the least of my worries). The doctor is also going to send me back to the Radiologist for another consult so maybe we can fry some more of these 'things' off.
Since my last post, life has been full of ups and downs. My red count level went WAY down and I ended up with a blood transfusion :o( Not the first thing on my wish list but the doctors were worried that I wouldn't bounce back so easily as time went on. I was SO tired too! At least now I have a little oomph to my step. I have blood work again tomorrow so hopefully things will look much better.
I'm sorry that my last post was really dark but I needed somewhere to open up. After I posted it and talked to the Oncologist again, I realized I knew all along that there would be no cure. Nope, I have this thing for the long run :o( The only thing we can hope for are in-between periods were cancer doesn't rear its ugly head and I can try to live as close to a normal human being as I can.
It sure does put a new perspective on life. Now my thoughts are mostly about getting my affairs in order, how to teach DH my banking system, leave Junior something so that he'll remember his mother and learn new things about her, figure out where or if I want to be buried but most of all, how can I ease the pain I'm going to inflict on my family and friends when that day comes.
WHOA! Okay, we're getting way too dark and way too serious and I can't end this post like that. I promise I'll post some pictures soon :o) I have a new one of Roses Of Provence and I'm sure you all need your Junior fix since he's not in the monthly spotlight anymore. LOL!
To those of you who have emailed me or sent me birthday wishes, I want to thank you so much for thinking about me :o) My email is just too backed up right now so I apologize for acknowledging your thoughtfulness in a group. ((((HUGS))))
